Chapter 6: "Please." Wei Zhiyuan's low voice trembled, "Don't throw me away."
Le Ge was quick to do things, and Wei Zhiyuan's hukou soon arrived, and he was registered as a member of Wei Qian's family. Now it was not a problem to send him to elementary school.
It was not difficult to feed Wei Zhiyuan. Just give him enough to eat. Wei Zhiyuan could eat everything, was not a picky eater, and took the time to absorb all the nutrients he could. Half a year later, he jumped up in height. Perfectly explaining what "give some sunshine and it will shine" (1) meant.
He couldn't wear Xiao Bao's clothes anymore, so Wei Qian had to let him wear his own old clothes.
Wei Zhiyuan still didn’t like to talk to people, except for the Wei family and a few brothers who often visited, he didn’t talk to others (2). He was still very defensive. However, Wei Zhiyuan had almost no other problems. He was extremely good at observing words and expressions (3). As long as Wei Qian frowned, he would immediately receive the signal that his da ge was unhappy and within three seconds, he could disguise himself as a mural on the wall and pretend that he didn’t exist.
He was very diligent at home and cleaned the house every day. Since Wei Zhiyuan came, the hot water in the kettle had always been full, and the garbage had never stayed in the house overnight. When he saw clothes that were thrown on the ground, he would silently wash them.
He was alert and obsequious, positioning himself as a vassal and guard dog. To strangers, his eyes were frightening. His eyes were like black beans, when he looked at people, he was like a bad wild dog.
Those were the observation’s Sanpang had made, Wei Qian didn't take it to heart. He thought that a puppy was a puppy. Anyway, this child was not troublesome. He was usually not at home, it would be fine to let him be a companion for Xiao Bao.
...Until something happened soon afterwards.
That day, an unscrupulous gang weren't paying attention to where they were walking and happened to step onto Le Ge's territory. They smashed one of Le Ge's younger brother's head open. On the same day, both gangs planned a meetup and went there wielding weapons, intending to fight each other, unfortunately, the rendezvous place was located on a street near Wei Qian's house.
Before Wei Qian could look back, he heard Sanpang yelling next to him: "Oh, fuck me!"
Wei Qian was startled to see that Wei Zhiyuan was carrying a uniquely long water pipe and dragging it across the ground. He was running towards him in a very happy manner.
Wei Qian happened to see his eyes, and he found that Sanpang was right. The little thing's eyes were really like a fierce wild dog. Although he dragged such a long water pipe and could not walk steadily, it was so strange that he could see the boy’s determination to kill the enemy emanating from him.
To put it bluntly, he had the kind of "killing intent" described in martial arts novels.
Sanpang: "Boy, what did you bring back?"
Wei Qian: "Don't mention it, I didn't bring a magnifying glass when I brought it back if only I knew."
(TN: lololol why of course you brought back a cute pup :P)
Sanpang sighed in amazement and called out to Wei Zhiyuan from afar: "Everything's fine baby (TN: Um interesting word choice lolol), us brothers are done for the day, you didn't need to come, let's go back home."
Wei Zhiyuan knew Sanpang, and he stood still when he heard this, he blinked his big round eyes, looked at him, and then looked at Wei Qian. He dropped the hose, wiped his nose, and said: "Oh."
Because of this incident, Wei Qian had a dream when he went home that night. He dreamt that Wei Zhiyuan had become a perverted murderer. He didn't know how to run after killing people, he sat calmly among a pool of blood and called him, "Ge" with a blank expression.
Wei Qian jolted awake, covered in a thin layer of cold sweat. He sat up in bed and saw the naked little cub, who was lying down on the side of his stomach, sleeping in a daze, and couldn't help but raise his hand and run his fingers through his soft hair.
Wei Zhiyuan rubbed his head against Wei Qian’s palm unconsciously like a pig.
Wei Qian squeezed his small arms and legs again and found that he was soft everywhere, as soft as Xiao Bao. He didn’t look like a murderer at all. He was dreaming and smacking his lips together, it was unknown what delicious foods he was dreaming about.
He sat by and observed the boy for a while. He thought to himself, this bastard is only this old and he's already so aggressive, would he still be like that in the future? He didn't care about anything other than whether or not the boy would cause him trouble.
In the future...Ah, what a vague word "future" was.
Wei Qian couldn't sleep anymore. He got out of bed, walked to the balcony, and pushed the window open a little. He thought about his own "future" in the dead of night with the gusts of cold wind in the chilling winter.
High school tuition was much more expensive than that of compulsory education (4). Wei Qian only managed to scrape up enough money for one semester. During his six months in high school, his savings from his mother were almost completely spent. Now, with the weather getting colder, Wei Qian was almost at the end of his tether, but there was no place to vent because he was the big brother. Wei Qian dreamt of finishing high school. He dreamt of being like most people in this city, dressed in a suit, working a 9 to 5 and living decently.
"Decent", that was his broken and vein-like, yet persistent, dream. Though it seemed so foolish, so unreachable, and so unrealistic. (5), even though it seemed so stupid, distant and illusory.
Reality did not allow him to fantasise a future like this. The heavy high school courses took up all of his time, and his teacher would not allow him to leave school alone to work when others were studying at night.
Xiao Bao was seven years old, and he had to go to school. Because of his selfishness as a big brother, he only cared about his tuition fees and dreams, and intentionally or unintentionally missed the time to sign Xiao Bao up for primary school. She was delayed for a year.
Wei Qian didn’t dare to delay her next year.
Wei Qian walked into the kitchen quietly, and there were only less than two kilograms of old rice left in the rice jar. There was also a green onion and a few rotten vegetable leaves in the kitchen. He still had ten yuan and fifty cents left in his pocket. (TN: £1.50/ $2/ 2.6 Euros)
He wanted to buy food, daily necessities, pay for the water and electricity bills...
He needed so much money to maintain a minimal lifestyle.
This kind of life was like a sack full of holes, with holes everywhere, the money Wei Qian's earned easily flowed out, he was exhausted.
Wei Qian's way of making money was still to do odd jobs every weekend. With the addition of a family member, the money was not enough. When Wei Qian left every morning, he cooked a dish and left two steamed buns for the two children, and then claimed to eat at school.
If he didn’t save lunch money, they wouldn't have enough. But after all, he was at a gluttonous age and was a big eater, so Wei Qian would take advantage of the lunch break to climb over the wall and walk out of school. He would go to Le Ge's billiard hall to warm up to people and eat lunch along the way. After a semester, he felt that his billiard skills were almost half of a professional’s level.
Every day...
Every day daily necessities were like a whip. From the moment he opened his eyes, he would be whipped non-stop forced to think of ways to handle them.
This made it difficult for Wei Qian to calm down. Under heavy pressure, no one could calm his mind. He found a half-full pack of cigarettes in his pocket. It was given to him by someone during a fight in the afternoon. He suddenly recalled how others looked when puffing smoke clouds, so Wei Qian sat in the kitchen and lit a cigarette. He coughed and learned how to smoke his first cigarette without a teacher.
The lack of oxygen in his lungs made him feel dizzy and even nauseous. Wei Qian sat on the floor, resting against the door panel for a while.
Otherwise... I won't go to school. He thought blankly.
"I really can't help it." Wei Qian said to himself, "I am really exhausted, and there’s nothing I can do."
He was so sad that he was about to cry. It was like watching the door to another world and another life slowly close in front of him. He tried his best to catch up, but it was always beyond his reach.
At this moment, Wei Qian remembered the words of Le Ge— “You can go to me if you have any difficulties”.
Wei Qian opened his eyes and thought for a moment. Suddenly, he stood up as if he had grabbed a life-saving straw. He clumsily held a cigarette between his two fingers. The whole person was trembling for the broad road that suddenly appeared in front of him.
Wei Qian’s throat was a little dry, he couldn't wait to rush to Le Ge now.
Yes, Le Ge would certainly lend him money. When he finished school or even university, he would come back to repay Le Ge with a different identity. As long as Le Ge was willing to provide for him, he no longer had to worry about whether he would eat or not every day, and he no longer had to calculate and manage the little money at home. He had constantly studied for the past few years. He promised that he would get top grades...
The hot soot fell on Wei Qian's hand, making him shiver.
He silently lowered his head, staring at the broken butt of the shoddy cigarette for a while, twisted out the butt of the cigarette and threw it in the garbage can.
Wei Qian's hot brain cooled down, and he found that he couldn't do it.
He always remembered the story of crossing the river, especially the experience of listening to the story in his mother's arms, which was the only extravagant memory he had. He remembered that woman saying, "People can't live too comfortably, by the time you've become a leisurely rich person, who eats to their heart's content until dusk, burping throughout the night, you're still prone to catching a cold." (6)
Le Ge could help him once, but could he always help him?
Help the starving but not the poor. (7)
What obligation did Le Ge have to give him money, let him go to school, let him eat, dress warmly and live carefreely?
Towards such carefree days, Wei Qian did not know why he felt both a sense of yearning yet it also gave him chills (8). He seemed to suddenly visualise his comfortable and weak self, he was like a pig that was trapped.
Was there anything in the world that scared a teenager like him more than "weakness"?
Was there anything in the world that made a teenager like him more desperate than "no hope"?
If Wei Qian were not weak, he would have to drop out of school, and embark on a hopeless road - leaving school to become a gangster, a thug, a part-time worker, become a scumbag at the bottom of the city and live his life with difficulty.
It was a road that he could see the end of at a glance.
Wei Qian didn't know how long he had been in the kitchen, his hands were numb from the cold. He sniffed, then returned to the small bedroom separated by a curtain in the living room and laid back on the bed.
Wei Qian's house only had one bedroom and one living room. After Xiao Bao was three years old, he felt that it was convenient for her to sleep with him, so he gave the bedroom to his sister. He pulled out a curtain in the living room and put a bed in the corner, which could be regarded as a separate bedroom. Wei Zhiyuan always slept with him.
When Wei Qian lay back on the bed, the little guy next to him moved. He didn't know whether he was awake or not.
Wei Zhiyuan cautiously opened his eyes, looked at the face of his da ge, and smelled the suffocating smell of smoke on his body. Wei Zhiyuan was not Xiaobao, he had never been spoiled since he was a child, so he didn’t dare to be as thoughtless as her.
Xiao Yuan tried to figure out what Wei Qian was thinking (9), and gently called out, "Ge"
Wei Qian was agitated and didn't want to pay attention to him.
Xiao Yuan waited for quite a while, not waiting for his reply, he gently tugged at his clothes, he asked, "Ge, you have no money to raise me?"
Wei Qian said in his head, “Luckily you still know” - but he didn't say these words aloud, not because he didn't want to hurt the child's heart, rather he felt that "admitting one's own powerlessness and lack of money" would extremely harm one’s reputation.
Therefore, he unhappily shook off Wei Zhiyuan's hand: "What nonsense, are you still asleep? Shut up!"
Wei Zhiyuan didn't say a word for a long time, and Wei Qian thought he was asleep. Unexpectedly, after a while, the little guy rustled up, got into his quilt, and bumped Wei Qian's cold hands and feet. It was very cold in the house during winter, and heat did not reach this forgotten old shantytown at that time.
There were children at home, and Wei Qian was worried about lighting a stove, so he used the money he saved over more than half a year to buy a second-hand electric heater, but that thing required electricity after all, and they usually didn’t turn it on if they could.
The temperature of Wei Qian's cold skin made Wei Zhiyuan instinctively shudder. However, a moment later, the boy shivering approached him, put his hands around Wei Qian's hand, put it in his arms, and stretched his legs. His head almost had to be buried in the quilt to reach Wei Qian's feet. He gently put his feet on his brother's cold feet.
In an instant, Xiao Yuan felt the temperature of his whole body rapidly flow away.
After he finished doing this, he persuasively whispered, "Don't leave me, okay? I can work, I can pick up rubbish, and I can make money."
These soft words almost made Wei Qian's heart tremble.
Probably because he didn't answer for a long time, Wei Zhiyuan began to panic.
Wei Qian provided him with a safe and warm home, a home he envied and dared not imagine before, he had never beaten him, and he didn't even ask him to do much work.
Even this winter, the da ge bought thick cotton-padded clothes for him and Xiaobao.
Wei Zhiyuan felt that it was almost like a beautiful dream. He was afraid that he would wake up from the dream, and he would be the unwanted beggar, wandering in the coldest part of the city, picking up garbage for a living.
"Please." Wei Zhiyuan's low voice trembled, "Don't throw me away."
Two seconds later, he added another word: "Ge."
Wei Qian had mixed feelings in his heart. It was impossible to say that he didn't want to throw away the child and relieve himself a little burden.
However, in the end, he simply flicked Wei Zhiyuan's head and ordered: "Sleep."
There was nothing else to say.
However, after raising cats and dogs for more than half a year, it was time to raise feelings, let alone individuals.
Not to mention that this little guy followed him around him every day, trying his best to work, just to make him a little bit happy so that he would let the boy stay.
Wei Qian knew that he was soft-hearted. He thought that he shouldn't be soft-hearted, but he couldn't help it. After all, he was not a rock.
Forget it, he thought, listening to the small breath in his ear, and said in his heart, this poor little boy.
TN notes: click here to skip
(1) Idiom! I think the English equivalent would be something like: Give someone an inch and they'll take a mile. I found 2 Baidu forums on it that may help to better understand it? Link 1 Link 2
(2) Remember doesn't always mean actual siblings, just a term to address someone you know :P
(4) Nine-year compulsory education policy in China enables students over six years old nationwide to have free education at both primary schools (grade 1 to 6) and junior secondary schools (grade 7 to 9). The policy is funded by the government, tuition is free. Schools still charge miscellaneous fees. Senior secondary school (grade 10 to 12) (TN: Which I assume is what WQ is starting) and college education are not compulsory and free in China. Source Link
(5) Editor's explanation: He's saying his dream is continuous like the veins you see on your body. Referring to how there's no endpoint for the veins on your body.
(6) Idiom! Explanation stolen from my editor, too big-brained for me lololol: In super simple words means after all your hardships have gone away, you still need to discipline yourself, danger is always near.
(7) Idiom! It's basically the Chinese version of, "Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime"
It's based on a story that you can read here!
Here's an explanation I found on this site I just directly translated it w/ google: The phrase "save the emergency but not the poor" is easy to understand. This is when we borrow money, we must adhere to our own principles. Being poor is not terrible. What we have to do is to help them get rid of poverty, not just give them money. This cannot solve the fundamental problem. If the other party is lazy and tasty, it becomes a habit to live by borrowing money all day long, not seeking to make progress, and in any case, can not lend him money, otherwise, it would be harming him.
Don't be a good person, we must remember that our kindness is not a tool for others to deceive us. We should lend a helping hand to those who are in dire need of help, but the help should be limited, and everything after the difficulty has passed depends on them. It can help him find a job and enlighten him to reform. This is the best choice. Just lending him money will not really help him get out of trouble.
(8) Idiom! (毛骨悚然) Basically means creepy. Definition for this Baidu page: The hair is horrified, a Chinese idiom, pinyin is máo gǔ sǒng rán, meaning that the hair is erected and the backbone is cold; it describes the appearance of fear and horror. So I translated it as giving him the chills.
Yep this chapter was sad :( I feel so bad for them wuwuwu poverty sucks! Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter, see you next week! This chapter was actually pretty smooth to go over, maybe I'm getting better at identifying Idioms lol, not to mention i started translating character by character as a form of proofreading, which is very confusing sometimes but helpful and accurate most times :P Also, Third Fatty's name is Sanpang which I decided to write as Third Fatty but now I feel like it just sticks out lol, since Mazi also directly translated means spotted face (I think don't quote me pls) but i thought that sounded weird... should I keep it as it is or call them 'Mazi' and 'Sanpang'? Edit: Decided to change it to Sanpang Sorry for all these questions when it's literally me who's working on these chapters not you guys loIol.
Also decided to get rid of all ko-fi links due to guilty conscience (yes i overthink a lot lol) instead from now on I'll link raws where you can support Priest!Support the author here